Wednesday 8 May 2013

ageism

i was at the hairdresser's last week having my hair cut as you do when you go to a hairdresser and as usual we started chatting..you know the sort of thing..

h: 'how are you?'
j: 'yeah, i'm good thanks..you?'
h: 'i'm good too..do you keep busy?'
j: 'i won't live long enough to do everything i want to do'
h: 'what sort of things do you like doing?'
j: 'well..i've got a blog'
h: 'what did you say?'
j: 'i've got a blog'
h: 'oh..i thought that's what you said but i wasn't sure if i'd heard wrong..most people don't know what a blog is..what do you write about?'

i told him that i mainly write about recipes that i create and that occasionally i write about other things  and i gave him the example of a food waste post i did a while back about which i elaborated a little..when i mentioned that i was on facebook too he asked if i used it to stay in touch with people..i told him that i tended to use it more to stay informed about social and political issues through the abc, radio national, national geographic and so on..i also told him that i follow a couple of graffiti and street art sites because i have a strong interest in the way it's used by some as a platform for social and political expression..

his surprise at my involvement with social media was palpable..what i didn't mention were all the other things i do such as bushwalking, mowing my lawn with a hand mower, chopping wood, growing most of my own vegetables, making all of my bread, yoghurt, jams, cold pressed soap and greeting cards, renovating a house on my own (stripping wallpaper, sanding, painting, chipping off tiles etcetera), sewing, cooking, restoring furniture and so on..and by the way i didn't mention that just a day or so earlier i'd moved 3/4 ton of split red gum firewood from my driveway and stacked it in my shed..

i've had a few days to think about the interaction i had with him and why i feel as if i've made a significant change..in the not too distant past i would not have talked about myself like i did after being asked 'do you keep busy?' i know i would have felt uncomfortable with the question but at the time i would not have been able to identify what the discomfort was telling me..after considerable rumination i might have eventually realised but that would have only made me feel worse..in responding the way i did i've realised that i stood up for myself rather than allowing myself to be patronised with an ageist question..a question that i doubt he would have asked a younger client..




note:
h=hairdresser
j=jane

6 comments:

  1. Great stuff Jane, good for you! Your life is incredibly full and productive and you have every right to be proud and to share it with others.

    Conversations with our hairdressers can vary cant they? At times it is gossip, other times more serious chat. The things they must hear!?

    Love your wheelbarrow of wood too. There is something rewarding about dealing with wood isn't there? x

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    1. hi jane..i don't think he's very happy in his job..he told me once that he'd rather be working in a funkier salon..i can understand that but i think his bias, young is interesting and old is boring, got a bit of a shake up..

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  2. Go Girl!!! This post has reminded I must go and get my frizzy bush trimmed too. I've found a hairdresser who is almost mute....

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    1. thanks wcd..the problem is that it's not just hairdressers..my doctor asked me exactly the same thing a few days later..

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  3. LOL! Good on you! At 49 I get the very same things...I have had people elevate their voices at me...49 = deaf? I think NOT folks...so I just elevate my voice right back at them...the uncomfortable realisation of an agist faux-pas is palpable ;). Get over yourselves "young people"...we are just YOU in a few years time. And you can only BEGIN to hope that you are as good as we are at our age when you get here! ;)

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    1. i don't get the stereotype at all..my gran was growing vegetables and playing tennis until she was well into her 80's and my mother was a life force to be reckoned with..she even had a young lover around the time she died at 80..my son in law's mother is in her 90's and she's just stopped working in a cafe!

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